What is radical acceptance? The other day one of my best friends said in a chat group, “People really need to learn to radically accept their disabilities.” This prompted another person to say something about not having heard of it, which confused us because our whole chat was a bunch of people who radically accepted they were disabled. Some of us were doing so, it seems, with no idea what the word for it was.
Continue readingTag Archives: Motivation
Monday Motivation: Failure is an Option
For me, failure was always hard to accept. With NPD, nothing less than being seen as perfect was ok. The problem was nothing I did felt like success. I often felt my failures made me a bad person. That my many mistakes meant I could never succeed and then I had to remind myself of my favourite childhood quote from Paul “Bear” Bryant:
“When you make a mistake, there are only three things you should ever do about it:
1. Admit it.
2. Learn from it, and
3. Don’t repeat it.”
Mistakes didn’t mean I was bad, just that I should learn from them. It was ok not to know things; it was ok to have failure. Failure and mistakes are part of learning. It is part of the experience. As Adam Savage said, “Failure is always an option.” Being able to accept this option though took me some work.
I had to reframe my failure as a success. That each time I made a mistake, I really was on track to succeed. My failures aren’t failures, really. When I messed up, I simply just made another step to success.
Striving to be perfect does not bring the admiration I desire. Being able to fail with grace, to be successful and admit my failings is not a bad thing. I do not think my mistakes make me a failure or a bad person. When I mess up, I learn from that and move on. It is ok to make mistakes.
Failure is an option. Your mistakes are steps to success. They are not dark marks that make you a bad person. Learn from them, use them to grow and keep on staying motivated.
Monday Motivation: We All Are on The Path Part 1
By Damien Knight
In life we all are taking “The Path.” It might not be the same path, but we are on the path of life. When we walk this path together, we must remember to embrace those we love and not force our way down the path. Forcing instead of walking the path leaves us hampered spiritually. We become bitter, controlling we lose our flow.
Love: A Biblical Essay written 2003
By Damien Knight
Love is Kind and forgiving, for it is said: “Love covers over all wrongs.” Proverbs 10:12. Goodness is part of love. To eat plain with love surrounding you is better than to have steak in a room filled with bitterness. Love is understanding, “He who covers and offense promotes love.” Proverbs 17:9. Many seek out love, yes even I, “What a man desires is unending love.” Proverbs 19:22. And many claim their love never fails. Yes, men might fail but love is unfailing. I choose to fill my heart with love.
Letter From Ms. S—
Prologue By Damien Knight
When I was younger I stayed in Ten Broeck, a Louisville, Kentucky mental facility. Ms. S was one of the few supportive an encouraging people I had growing up. She wrote the entire letter in all caps and left it on my desk on Christmas day.
_______,(Blank for Deadname)
MERRY CHRISTMAS! I HOPE YOU HAD A GOOD VISIT WITH YOUR FAMILY TODAY! I’M GLAD YOU HAD THE OPPORTUNITY TO SHARE THIS SPECIAL DAY WITH PEOPLE WHO LOVE AND CARE ABOUT YOU VERY MUCH.
(I want to comment that while I am sure my family does love me at that time I felt very abandoned by them. It was very hard to see through my own struggles with depression and dysphoria.)
CONGRATS ON MAINTAINING YOUR LEVEL. YOU SHOULD BE VERY PROUD OF YOURSELF AND YOUR PROGRESS. THANK YOU FOR BEING SUCH A POSITIVE ROLE MODEL FOR YOUR PEERS. YOU HAVE DEMONSTRATED SUCH GREAT MOTIVATIONAL/LEADERSHIP ABILITIES OVER THE RECENT WEEKS.
(I wrote a lot of motivational pieces and poems when I was in. I would read them at the end of the day to the girls during end day group time.)
YOU ARE WISE FAR BEYOND YOUR YEARS AND COULD TEACH THESE GIRLS SO MUCH. I APPRECIATE YOUR WILLINGNESS TO PROVIDE DIVERSIFIED INSIGHT. KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK!
MERRY CHRISTMAS,
MS. S—
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Monday Motivation: Make Time for Love
By Damien Knight
Love has a funny way of making us behave in ways we don’t normally do. We text all night, we write poetry, serenade, or in general smother our lovers with gifts. All wonderful things. In todays fast pace world of facebook and texting sometimes we forget those we love. Ghosting, which is cowardly and heartbreaking, occurs. It’s not always because you no longer love the person. Some people are procrastinators. “I’ll talk to them tomorrow.” Or maybe you had a tragic event in your life. “I have to deal with this.” A few seconds out of your day, make time hold on to those you love. Say hello to old friends. Keep in touch with your lover/lovers. Never be to busy for love.
Stay Motivated!
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Monday Motivation: Time Management
By Damien Knight
What time did you get up this morning? 11 maybe noon? It’s summer after all right why get up at 5:30? You can just stay up until midnight anyway, or maybe you think you can just get up earlier tomorrow. There are 86400 seconds in a day, are you maximizing that? Ben Franklin Said early to bed early to rise.
This week I begin working on time management and will update on how it is going. Stay Motivated!
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Monday Motivation: Forgiving Yourself, Forgetting the Past
By Damien Skye Knight
Today’s motivation is ‘forgive yourself’ and accept mistakes in others. I have already talked about how we have to “Shed Your Past”. Today I want to talk about one way we do that. We do this through forgiveness, not just of others but yourself. We are our hardest critics, sometimes we can’t help blame ourselves for things we couldn’t control. Or maybe we could but now it’s too late to change it.
What do you do if you can’t forgive yourself? Wallow? Last month was yet another anniversary to the death of my beloved Misty. She was murdered April 2005. For years I beat myself up over her. If I asked her to stay would she be alive? The truth is, it is something I cannot change and I will never know. All I can do is forgive myself. I can’t control it nor can I change it. If I did something to another person and it causes me guilt the only action I have available now is apology. If they accept it great if not I still need to move on and forgive myself.
The last part is forgetting other’s wrongs. We never truly forgive and forget with other people as humans our memories make a large part of our identity. To forgive ourselves and others though we have to accept mistakes that are made and do so with grace. This is hard when the other party refuses to acknowledge wrongdoing, abuse, or suffering caused to you. Ask yourself does holding on to that anger and resentment help you heal? The answer is no. Let go and accept what has happened in this way you forgive them and move forward on your journey to forgive yourself.
Stay Motivated!
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Acomplishment-Driver’s Liscense
I am so proud of myself. At 32 I’ve learned to drive. I have been driving everywhere this week. Been to church first time in years, took the kids out. It really is freedom. #newdriver #gotacar #selfie #selfmademan #goals #proud. #motivation
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Motivational Monday: Dr. Martin Luther King
By Damien Knight
Today we remember Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. While I could write about what he means to people today but his words stand on their own.
“I have a dream that one day on the red hills of Georgia, the sons of former slaves and the sons of former slave owners will be able to sit down together at the table of brotherhood.”
― Martin Luther King Jr., I Have a Dream: Writings and Speeches That Changed the World
With today’s news and increased visibility of racial tensions let us not forget Dr. Martin Luther King Jr’s dream. After all : “Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.”
― Martin Luther King Jr., I Have a Dream: Writings and Speeches That Changed the World
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The Shade of Writing 